Almost 2007!!!

Sigh...........
That was quite the ride! Christmas came and Christmas is going, going, almost gone! It was like one minute I was at the mall trying to remember everything and anything I may have forgotten, then WHAM! Here I am Friday December 29. This is my first time to just sit on the computer! Working Christmas is one thing, trying to do everything else you'd normally do for Christmas on top of that, now that's where it gets tough!
In retrospect, this may have been one of the best Christmas' ever! I got to do it all! Spent time with my family, did gifts Christmas eve. Then woke up Christmas morning, got ready for work and headed off. It was a foggy morning, but there was nothing to see, the roads were completely clear, it was a little freaky but I mostly felt astonished to look right down Fairway Road, look left down Fairway Road and NOTHING! At 7:45am Christmas morning all was quiet and everyone was where they were supposed to be. I soon was right where I was supposed to be, it all started in the house I was scheduled in. My biggest fear was that it was going to feel like a regular old day, but I quickly realized that it just couldn't be a regular old day. We had three clients, out of four- G had gone home for the week. T was going home at noon for the evening and K's family was coming in to do gifts. We had a beautiful morning! Then the call came from next door! Everyone was finally awake, dressed and ready to open presents! The wonderful nurses I was working with told me to go! I had two hours! When one of the nurses had to take T home. So I ran next door, everyone was all lined up around the Christmas tree. My arrival made it 1:1 for present opening. I, of course helped M. He had the most to open, I don't think they really noticed though. He loved everything! He wanted me to help him, but he didn't want me to just do it for him! He was especially excited about his Hot wheels and his stuffed snake. He was thrilled by the big ones and even when it was clothes he still loved it all! So far, he's mastered many of his learning toys. We took out the Leap Pad yesterday, I'm sure he'll have that mastered in a few days as well.
New Year's is this weekend. I'm actually off and no one is really getting together to party. I'm really disappointed, it would have been really great! Instead, I some how am going to The Stampede with a couple. Everyone else decided to go to Molly Blooms. If I had the money, KR and I would so be taking off to NYC!!!!!!!!!! Screw it all! Lets get crazy!
Thought/Quote of the day....... 2 more days left in the year, is anyone else having trouble saying/writing 2007???

My Angel is getting BETTER!!!!!

Just wanted to let you know he's making a miraculous recovery! I saw him tonight, he's almost back to his regular self. I was at a different house, when I got off at 8pm, I popped in to see him. I had heard from the nurse already, that he was doing much better, but went to see for myself. He was off the oxygen and back on regular feeds. Stupid me, I walked in with a Zehrs bag(my lunch) and right away he got excited because he thought I had a present for him. As I have brought in bags with presents so many times before. When I showed him it was just an empty water bottle, bottle of diet coke and an empty Christmas container, he looked confused. But then he decided he wanted to play with the container, he wore it as a hat, then made me do the same. He laughed so hard, deep belly laughs, that made him cough but it is good for him to get it out. We played for a while with his magnetic toys he had laying around. Then I pointed to the clock and the dark night outside and told him I needed to go home to bed. He made a mad face and scrunched his eyebrows. So I put my head down on his chest, closed my eyes and pretended to snore. Again, he tried not to laugh because he was supposed to be mad, but he couldn't hold in those deep belly laughs. He tried to rip my coat off, and make me stay awhile, but I told him it was bedtime. He wasn't impressed and wouldn't give me a kiss goodbye. So I kissed him on each cheek a million times really fast, until he laughed again. But still refused to give me a kiss. So I made a sad face and waved goodbye. Then in the door, I looked back one more time and he raised his hand to his mouth and blew me a kiss. I blew him one back with a big smile. It was cool because usually when he tries to do that his hand has a hard time reaching his mouth; this time it looked like he did it with no effort.
He didn't have that sick look in his eyes, a couple days ago he couldn't even smile. This is the fastest recovery I've ever seen him have. Must have been all of the prayers and well wishes.
Being at the group home for Christmas is looking better than it ever has.
Thought/Quote of the day................
To love for the sake of being loved is human,
But to love for the sake of loving is angelic.
-Alphonse De Lamartine

My Angel

Christmas is quickly approaching and all I can think about is my boy. (can't use names-confidentiality). Starts with M ends with L. You know who. Anyway, I'm afraid he's going to spend Christmas in the hospital. His tonsils are inflamed, enlarged and pussy. His temperature has been up to 41 C. He started antibiotics yesterday and has been on Tempra, since the weekend. But with all of the vomiting, I'm not sure how well its working. I worked with him yesterday, and he got lots and lots of cuddles but tonight I was in a different house. I stopped in for a few minutes to see how he was doing, he just asked for his basket of books. When I left at midnight, I popped my head in and he was sleeping. But the nurse told me that his oxygen level hadn't been stable and it sounded like she was a little worried.
Unfortunately, his parents will not agree to have his tonisls removed. Even though they have nothing to do with him, they make all of his medical decisions. We're the ones that heard his first words, experienced him lose his first baby tooth, kiss him goodnight, comfort him when he's sick, get puked on, read him his bedtime stories and tuck him into bed every night. We're the ones who love him, yet we have no say. His mother dumped him on our doorstep and she'll be relieved if he doesn't live to see his 6th birthday, he's just a burrden. They're the ones that made him DNR and we're the ones that would have to watch him die, if God forbid he ever needed CPR.
The system SUCKS! And I feel like a small, tiny voice inside a large, loud room of authority. What can I do? All the old nurses have seen it a thousand times and just accept it. I can't accept it, not just because he's my boy. But his parents don't know him! They don't see what we see, they're not around. He's a real little boy inside a body that doesn't cooperate with him. I know I'm too close to him, everyone knows that; but it doesn't mean I'm not thinking rationally. Is it crazy to care? Is it crazy to see him as a little boy? Not just a client?
Thought/Quote of the day...........
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life-The Fray

A day in the life of me

Woke up to empty living room! New couch, coming tomorrow!!!
Found out plans are all a go, for Saturday- Christmas get together with friends at my house!
Went to work, practically on empty-no time to stop! Oh yeah, gotta get oil changed and 2 new tires!
Met Michelle's (friend at work) Fiancee and her little Pomeranian/Yorkie named Casey! Thee cutiest dog ever!!! I want one!!!
Day shift made brownies! Yummy!
Supervisor, accidently flushed cell phone down the toilet! Toilet didn't ring and it worked all night.
Hooked up some tube feeds.
Ate supper and went out for a smoke.
Gave one client a shower, gave a little one a cuddle, played with another on the computer.
One staff took other client to the mall for new PJ's.
Put everyone to bed.
Did some laundry and dishes (days made a lot of dishes!!)
Wrapped some presents, balanced petty cash.
Did call-in to fill day shift, called every registered staff! Went into over time.
Tidied up, emptied garbages, did one more round of the kids in bed. Did my charting.
Actually had time to watch t.v at work and Grey's Anatomy wasn't even on and E.R was a repeat!!!! Piece of crap!
Still didn't get gas! Oh Man!
Planned to go shopping with Marta tomorrow! Not Toronto this time.
Going out for breakfast with Mom and Dad tomorrow morning.
Checked emails, everyone else is in bed.
Smoking, enjoying a Diet Coke.
Song in my head all day! How to Save a Life-The Frey
Thought/Quote: Funding for 3 staff for 4 clients at my work and we wait 12 hours in an E.R for Emergency medicine??!!!!

Beta

I updated to beta Blogger, hopefully I can receive all of your wonderful comments again!

What's Goin On

I have had 'Rivers of Babylon' by Boney M, in my head all day! (Must have been my earlier discussion with Jen.) It really makes you want to dance!
I watched thee best movie since the 'Note Book' the other night! 'All The Real Girls'- its an indie romance, (recomended by Brain on Reel to Reel) starring Zooey Deschanel and Paul Schneider.
It's a must see!!!!!!!!
Oh, Andrea you will be interested to know! I researched the Zellers commercial you thought was Tegan and Sara?! Well turns out its La Le LaLa by: Kinnie Starr BUT! Tegan Quinn of Tegan and Sara did the background vocals! Good ear! That's amazing!!
Jill dyed my hair lastnight. I am now, thanks to Sarah Jessica Parker, a brilliant cappuccino. I straightened my hair and wore it down today for the first time in a long time. I felt pretty and it put me in a good mood!
Tomorrow's a big day! I have to teach my first class! YIKES! It was supposed to be a group thing, you pick a related topic and for the whole 3 hours, you teach the class about the topic. My group is me! My partner quit school and instead of jumping in with another group and going along with what they already had, I stuck with my topic, Deaf/Hearing Impairment and am doing the 3 hours myself! Over heads and all! I know my sh*t but its still scary!! I'm a little excited too!
I also wanted to mention......Guess who is at The Stampede Corral this weekend?????!!!!!!!!!!!

DUN DUN NUN NA.........

LARRY BARRIO!!!!!

LOL!!! I'm working, too bad! Oh speaking of working weekends!!

#1. Our new contract gave us every second weekend off! We used to have 1 in 3.

#2. I applied for a Day Program position today, if I get it that means EVERY WEEKEND OFF!!!!!!!! Its just a Mat leave so its just for a year, but whatever! To be among the normal Monday to Friday Daytime people-thats very exciting! But I haven't even had an interview yet. We'll see what happens!

The house is getting very Christmas'y this week! Mom has been decorating the last couple of days and Dad put up the lights outside the other day! I drove down Bleams Rd. tonight and it looks a lot like like Christmas at The Duharts too! You can see the lights from the street! Speaking of bright lights, when I drive to school, I go the back way through Mill Park, to avoid HomerWatson. And there is a house up there that is worth a drive by, its insane, they went all out! We might go get the tree this weekend! Family traditions are starting up! Break out the

Boney M!!!!

Thought/Quote of the day.....

"And in our world of plenty we can spread a smile of joy"-BandAid (HaHa!! you'll be singing that one all day! "Feed the World...........")

Seriously!!! Not For The Faint Of Heart

I witnessed my first death this weekend.
I've always been lucky to avoid death. I would know someone was sick, be off a couple days and then come back and they'd be gone. In my four years, I've never really dealt with a dying person. The closest I came, was in the summer. A client became violently ill, I nursed him until the ambulance came. He never came back. So I could always just tell myself, they went to a better place, and think no more of it. Unitl last night.
I knew she had been sick, but when I arrived on shift and they told me that she had received her last rights that day, I knew it was grim. With the three of us working, we managed to take care of everyone else and have one of us at her bedside at all times. She was on 12% oxygen (Most of our sick people are on about 3 - 5%), her breathing was laboured and every now and then she'd hold it and I'd think -that's it. But she'd bounce back. I sat from 9pm, until, 12 am. And only left for a few minutes at a time. When I'd leave, though she wasn't verbal, she'd call out. When I'd return she'd clench my hand and close her eyes again. I sang to her and made her as comfortable as possible. When I left at midnight, I felt like that was it, I said good-bye and kissed her on her forehead. I felt sorry for the night staff as I saw the nurse get out the forms, I knew what they were for.
At 8am I returned to the neighbouring house, the first thing I did, was walk through and go straight to her. I didn't ask anyone if she was still there, I needed to see. I peeked slowly through the bedroom door and she was there! Oxygen still going, almost in the same position, I had left her. They told me her vital signs had plumetted in the middle of the night and they thought she was gone. They repositioned her and she went back up to normal levels. I went in and talked to her, she didn't open her eyes, but I went on anyway. (They say, hearing is the last thing to go.) I pinned an angel to the teddy she sleeps with and touched her hand, she didn't grasp it tightly like she had the past evening, but I could tell she tried.
Her family came and she was surrounded by people all morning. My shift ended at 12(noon) and I went in to say good-bye (this time) I felt for the last time. Her breathing was louder now, and her vital signs were lingering in the lower zones. I kissed her again on her forehead, rubbed her arm, leaned in real close and said good-bye sweetie....I wanted to say more but I had to take a deep breath and try and get my heart out of my throat; as her family watched.
I received a message on my cell phone that she had passed at 1:02pm. She waited until the family left. The staff were with her, one of them has been working there for 30 years, and has taken care of her for many of those.
I love what I do! But times like these, I wonder why I love it so much. When I told Mom, she didn't want to hear about it at all, she said, I don't know how you do it? And I just said without thinking, I don't know how to, not do it.
Thought/Quote of the Day............
"To beable to share some of your hearache with another, is to finally feel relief."